Monday, September 25, 2006

Ravel writes!

Dear all

Dolores here. I have been asked by Ravel if he can use this blog to make a statement about his boss. You must forgive any grammatical errors. He's come a long way in the last few months and we are encouraging him at every opportunity to practice his English (he's originally from Bulgaria. You can read how he came to the institute here). He's also quite a sensitive chap and wanted to say things 'alone in his words', so I've left things as he wrote them. You should be just about able to make sense of what he is writing.

'Dear bog people

My name is Ravel. I am proud senior research assistant with big scientist the famous Dr Joseph McCrumble. Maybe you heard my name sometimes in this bog. I am here today to tell you that my boss, Dr Joseph McCrumble, is innocent. Completely innocent he is. I try to defend my boss, Dr Joseph McCrumble, when they come for him but I get hit on the head by policeman with very hard stick. It hurt so much I get to hospital for two days and they let me go home. I now look after the wife of boss, Dr Joseph McCrumble on her own. Tonight I give her Bulgarian special.

I want to say it is not my boss, Dr Joseph McCrumble, fault that he is in prison. I make mistake of bringing not dead girl back to the Institute. I feel guilty and should be in prison not my boss, Dr Joseph McCrumble. If I could get him out I will. Do not forget he is guilty until proved innocent, so don't just give up. He needs our support to help him now with his crisis. I know he will be pleased that I ask you assault your member of the parliament with shouting cries of 'Freedom Dr Joseph McCrumble.'

I try to always be good assistant to my boss, Dr Joseph McCrumble, but sometimes it is not easy for me. I now speak little English but he is always good to me except when I make slang for sex up. This happens sometimes but not deliberate. We all slang for sex up somewhere yes?

I must now go because the wife of my boss, Dr Joseph McCrumble is making demands. You ever not accept demands of another mans wife, you are in big trouble. I tell you this from experiments.

with good wishes

Ravel

Senior Research Assistant with my boss, Dr Joseph McCrumble'

2 comments:

Gorilla Bananas said...

You're a good man Ravel. You'll have to explain what 'slang for sex up' is.

Katie said...

Oh Ravel

You are such a good guy and yes I agree that we should 'assault our member of the parliament with shouting cries of 'Freedom Dr Joseph McCrumble.' -- It worked for Deirdre in Coronation Street --- I'm still willing to come to Scotland to placard Take The High Road if yourself and Dolores think that will help in any way.

Keep on 'sexing up' Ravel

Katie